On this, the 4th Sunday of Advent, let us take a look at the Holy Gospel, and the figure of St. Joseph the Just, who demonstrates to us some of the essential qualities of manhood, of masculinity.
St. Joseph the Just is faced with a situation that he had not foreseen, nor he had planned. His wife to be, Mary, who is already engaged to him, is found to be with child. She becomes pregnant. If we put ourselves in Joseph’s shoes, we might guess at what sorts of movements were in his heart. He could have been deeply disillusioned: after all, Mary was already promised to him – this promise entailed fidelity to him, being faithful to her husband to be. He might also have been concerned about his dignity as a man: after all, an unforeseen pregnancy during an engagement is reason enough, provides enough grounds, to cancel the marriage – to back out from the wedding. He might have also been concerned about Mary’s reputation, her good name, in the town. In the midst of this entire situation, Joseph maintains great composure and self-possession. St. Ambrose of Milan, one of the Fathers of the Church, puts it this way: “He [Joseph] would not dare to say that It [the child] was conceived in adultery; he could not speak harshly against the Virgin…he knew well that there was something unknown to him”; still, he is “anxious” about the whole situation (The Sunday Sermons of the Great Fathers, M.F. Toal, ed., vol.1, 1957, pg. 116). How much time did Joseph take as he reflected, how many sleepless nights were his, before he decided to let Mary go quietly, to dismiss her without show, so as to not let her be publicly disgraced? The Gospel says that he had resolved to do this. Joseph was not of weak will, he would not sit on the fence for long, he would not make a decision by avoiding taking action.
It is then that in a dream he hears the words “Do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit”. Joseph, the Just Man, takes responsibility for Mary, takes responsibility for a situation that is not his own making. He takes responsibility for the life in the womb, the Child, who is conceived in Mary’s bosom. He becomes the protector of the Holy Family, and will lead the family into safety on many different occasions. In the last part of the Gospel we hear that Joseph awoke from sleep and did as the angel commanded him - he took Mary as his spouse. In this sense, the Incarnation of Jesus Christ is heavily based on two “yes” answers that were given – Mary’s fiat, Her yes, and Joseph’s agreement to take Mary as his wife.
Would that many men in our day and age, many men from our families, from our town, would say yes to God’s plan for their life. A yes that is based on self-control, self-possession, and virtue. Would that many more men would take responsibility for a life conceived in the womb, for a child; first and foremost, by doing everything to ensure that that child is born, and secondly, by assisting the mother of that child in educating, supporting and bringing up the child or children. For that to happen, I think that many more men need to hear the words “Do not be afraid”: do not be afraid of your own weaknesses, of financial difficulties, of what people will say if you have a large family; do not be afraid of surrendering some of your freedom, of space for hobbies and past-times, to take responsibility for a family, a wife, sons and daughters. Do not be afraid to act with your wife for the good of the family, remembering the “equal personal dignity of wife and husband” in marriage, as the Constitution Gaudium et Spes spells out (GS 49). Do not be afraid to trust in the Father and His promises, as King Ahaz refused to do in the First Reading; he did not want to put God to the test, because he did not want to believe that God could be faithful.
St. Joseph the Just believed – and now all ages remember him, a simple carpenter from Galilee, as the husband of Mary, Our Lady, the foster father of Jesus, God and Man, and the protector of the Holy Family. He took the angel’s words to heart – “Do not be afraid”. Would that many men follow his example of self-control, self-possession, and virtue.
(Fr. Pawel Ratajczak, OMI, Dec. 22, 2019)